Message Board Post by Me

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What do you think of people who stand out as being more popular and emotional?

etc.?

Like, that favorite teacher, maybe a music teacher?

Also, what do you think of how some kids match and are good people and could have a good relationship with people like favorite teachers, and then bad, out-of-place people act up and ruin it all? Today, people say younger people can't like older mentor-like figures, like a favorite teacher, because bad people will all act out like everyone wants to have that relationship and how there probably isn't enough time for everyone … and so make sure no one gets it because they know it wasn't for them then?

Message Board Post by Me

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Topic by Me

Are you like your parents?

…and do others think so?

I know how everyone in the US is obsessed with how their younger siblings are babyish and suck ups, but they forgot about comparing kids to their parents too and not just their younger siblings.

There's something crazy going around about being like your parents when you don't want to become that way.

Is it a natural feeling?

... that if you like someone you like their family?

DeviantArt

Colored Pencil

Kindle Unlimited

“How to Draw for Kids” - “Children Art Book Vol. 1”
(C) 2020 - Max Fun

Appreciative

While it seems I should only be appreciative of the older lady I like, I get depressed she's not that open with me like with others, like people from my life she knows about.  It happens in hurtful ways, like when I'm more vulnerable and don't know it.  Then, people get on my case and won't leave things be.

Too Many People

I'm not getting what I deserve because bad people want to take it, things like nostalgia for old days.

Maybe a Trap

Maybe, there's just no hope and this is all a trap.

"Forgotten"

I did already play along, but they are going overboard and this is extremely selfish.

Annoyed

People keep acting like I did something wrong.

...but...

Do what you will, you seem to believe it and meant it.

"A Disturbance in the Force"

If the older lady I like is all that in a certain way ... I forget what I was going to say ... oh yes, if she gets slack that she isn't really "all that" (but still gets more pleasure than others,) why does she have fame and popularity over me now?  It's not helping anyone.  She's "one more" famous person.  She didn't make everyone else famous through all this and popular.

People are like a herd of cattle, and if I notice something funny about her in these hard ways of communicating with my dad always threateningly mad at me ... does not mean everyone has to notice it and act on it like it's better that way, probably just ruining my relationship with her and maybe acting like she'll get more pleasure because she is popular but also after/through me in some ways.

I'm upset she may die someday, not a big life ahead, and people getting involved in bad ways is not helping.  I feel teased.  Come on, the whole world wants her.

They took advantage of me.

No one "gets it."

Someone I like a lot is there with people monitoring me in private being mean to me ... this person I like a lot, an older lady, who seemed smart and nice actually can't seem to get past blocks of thinking and keeps acting like it's smart to have already detected that my younger girl cousin is gonna get what I deserve like it's her business ... and this older lady actually went in and acted like my cousin was better.

"No one cares about me."

There are people monitoring me in private, and an older lady I like supposedly can punish me (for no reason) and it is like she is set to end our relationship.

College

I guess I may just go to college and not work or do ballet.  I graduate this semester.

I don't have money to take ballet classes to prepare for an audition, though I may go in and take classes.

Work would also take up time and is not beneficial to my health like ballet.

I am living on SSI and may move into a group home.

Why So Silent?

People act like they subdued me racially.

Used and Abused and Confused

People won't admit they made a mistake here and just want all this social drama that's hard on me.

Devalued

People think because others are bad that that changes my life because people say it was unfair I was good and that that's the only reason I get anything.

Gyped

People are mean to me and singling me out and acting like other people are better, at my expense.

People want to act like I'm in trouble when I'm a very good person and otherwise not associate with me as intensely.

I can see where this could be coming from.

The Phantom of the Opera's famous organ part is like candy or a lollipop for the organ.

I know a lot ... of songs.

I can sing most of "Gethsemane" from Jesus Christ Superstar, among a whole lot of other Broadway songs.

The 2 Big B's

Andrew Lloyd Webber is more like Bach than Beethoven, as they both played organ I know.

Pop Music

Broadway is labeled pop because it's also simpler than classical music.  Well, more in the middle of pop and classical, not sure the exact coordinates.

New York

What good is New York if you can't learn to like a New Yorker like me?

Home Videos - Ages 15-16

Home Video

Me Age 16 Doing Tai Chi for Kids Taught by My Mom

DeviantArt

Ducks

Colored Pencil

Kindle Unlimited

“How to Draw for Kids” - “Children Art Book Vol. 1”
(C) 2020 - Max Fun

Breakfast

Pancakes - Butter + Syrup

My favorite is thin and burned.

Hair Color and Race

So, how is black hair worth it if you're not all white?

Sports Mask

I can wear a mask if I have to.  Last time, no one did, but we were at least tested for a fever by measuring the temperature of our forehead.

So...

I'm gonna go to ballet until it's time to start and sign up and audition at that school.  I'm going to where they have some adult ballet classes running.

New Plan

Instead of getting my AA, I think I'm gonna take ballet and audition to be in The Nutcracker in a ballet company at a school for all ages and levels.  I guess I'll just hang in there until I need to move to a group home.  I'm also practicing violin.

Message Board Post by Me

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Topic by Me

What do you think about other posters here? People in general?

Well, I think most would unfriend me for gossiping about them if I "said" anything.

Most people here pretty much get what they can expect, but I feel people single me out like I'm bad. The people with more European heritage seem to all be mean to me.

Work

I've applied for 3 jobs as a receptionist.

Applying to Colleges

I'll need an apartment and to apply for SSI.

A Job Done

They (the people on the message board with heritage from Europe) don't draw as much attention to themselves usually but they always feel right like they've proven me to be shit.

Hateful Europeans Online

All the people with heritage from Europe are spiteful to me on a message board, like it's serious and I'm just a joke.

Fishing in America

I guess non-Americans want to be in league with Americans of an older generation.  Does that leave me free to move to Europe/Germany?

Working

I've applied for 2 desk jobs, I think as a greeter.  I was a greeter for Easter Bunny pictures in 2019, at the mall.  It's to support myself in college, like apartment, food, necessities, etc.

Uh-Oh

I don't like being someone who people once liked only to say wow to someone else and throw me out.

It's like, if you liked me you'll love this person even better, forever.

"Lame Excuse"

It seems like people might be having their kids as not as ideal so they can say they say they had it unfair and take from me.

Me Singing Now

Me Playing Violin Now

Harrassed

People won't stop harassing and terrorizing me.  It's like I can never escape.

Sickening

It's sick how some people get in my business who are up to no good and never talk to or pay attention to me.

Race - All the Same?

People want to treat every person the same according to their non-White race.  They think some look too non-White and the ones who are more White should be less White and not good compared to them.

Message Board Post by Me

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Topic by Me

Public Announcement: Race is Unavoidable

We all tie a lot to our past and culture/heritage, gives us all out emotions and hopes. It might seem more pertinent to non-Whites, but, like I said, we all have it. People can go on and on; just mention an ethnicity, and it works. For non-Whites, we all see the world with different kinds of spite for giving us the cold shoulder in ways that don't make sense in specific ways. It's a part of our lives, like it or not, and that's why we talk about it. People don't get in the way of Whites as much as the other way around, as far as I know. It's just that way of ignoring cultures but wanting to suck out the life of what they have that's special, important, etc., those feelings they subconsciously cling to.

"No! No! No!"

I don't want the world to turn into the mentality of my relatives.

I'm not here to be a social slave that hangs out ignored.

Sharing

You can share and have a relationship with someone older and not ruin it for their kids.

Who You Are? Excuses?

It's not about who your parents are.  It's about who you are.

Over

I keep thinking the problems will stop one day.  I'm guessing I'll take legal action if it follows me when I move out?

Is this true?

So, if you someone is related to you or you're a certain young age you get them as an adult mentor first dibs no matter what you and others do collectively?

I was supposed to...

I was supposed to meet people.  I'm not bad like everyone else, remember?

I need to talk to people, too, if you do!

How can you figure you're worth something and say if I interact I'm nothing?

Playing Along With the Crowd - Not for Me

It's interesting how people who received a proper education of encouragement in violin growing up know they are slaves to the orchestra and may play "follow the leader."  I know the music myself and play "follow the leader" more than most people, instead of going along with the crowd.

Why...

Why is the US corrupt compared to Europe?  Its children?!

(continued)

 A lot of people didn't care.

Well, what?

So, pretty much an older lady I like brought exploitation and emotional exposure on herself heavily around the earth.

What a Joke

I unfairly had to quit my music major, and people think that means I'm nothing and I also forgot about music, but I still have taste.  In fact, I've been singing and found a new instrument.

Cheap

People think I'm bad.

I'm all grown up!

I don't feel anyone cares about me like a parent.

Ignored, Not Talked to Much

People wait to "hear me out" only to try to feel on top of me when I'm "done."

Singled out, Bad Luck

People are trying to say I am worse than everyone else or just one in a crowd, when I think I am just a normal person.

In Trouble

I feel blamed when I did nothing that bad.

Confusion

Other people can chose to waste their life, confused.

Trap, Used to It

So, first people like to try me out and plan on blaming me, saying something about what I do socially they don't like, and everyone agrees.

(continued)

...but other people aren't treated as nastily and my good qualities are trashed.

"Hard to Get?"

A lot of people work hard to get my attention, but some people I like a lot get distracted and blame me for things socially.  What does that mean?

A "Slave?"

So, you need my attention and then you need me to be a slave while you give other people attention?

People Who Do Nothing Ever

People stuck in Orlando?!

Ever feel like this?

"When first I saw you,

I saw beauty,

And I blinded my eyes

For fear that I should weep.

When first I heard you,

I heard sweetness,

And I turned away,

For fear of my weakness.

I blinded my eyes,

My face I turned away,

I hardened my heart.

For fear of my ruin."

Racism - Irish and Asians

Why do Italians get the better of the Irish and Asians?

We are fine.

Everyone is fine.  No need for Hollywood to check in on them.

Is this another cry of war?

Scandinavia is being inappropriate.  They think we need to baby Germany, when Germany and the rest of the world is supposed to baby the US.  Scandinavians are busy there in Europe altering the situation.  They might think they did a neat job of it, but what about them they don't have another country further north like they need one to keep them going?  Some mixed Scandinavian Germans seem to be assertive and maybe go a little dizzy at some point.  At least, I can think of one example, for sure.  What's the point?  No one is "there for" us.  We can't go dizzy like that.  That's why people do things like cut themselves and maybe commit suicide in the end for maybe some other reason.

Picked On

People pick on me and not others when I'm not bad and they are.

Rude

How rude is it to appeal to someone like they made a small mistake for reasons they don't care about?

Making Fun of Nothing

I bet people are making fun of me for noticing they are mean to me.

Only Some Problems

Only some problems are worth analyzing.

Well

But Scandinavians pretended to be okay as people, not some sort of criminals.

Some Scandinavians?

Are some Scandinavians pretending to be better than they are?

Ruining It?

Are Scandinavians messing with Germans who are friends with any Americans?

Cause of Racism Is Racism

People pretend I'm bad because they're racist and say that means they can be racist to me secretly.

Piano and Guitar

It seems Americans are more nostalgic over piano than guitar.

Jesus - Sensitive

Did you ever think of how hard Jesus had it as he was a person and learned to be sensitive enough to do things like tell that Judas would betray him?

Learning Guitar

I have a pink electric guitar.

I am inspired to do sacred music and singing with it.

The piano should make it easy for what I want to do.

I am learning it note by note.  I will probably also learn chords, maybe later.

So, it's not plugged in but still works out for me.

My Family Is Torn Apart! and Half Dead

Why are some families acting like they were inadequate and getting shifty with me?

Life Goes On

I don't like holding in how disappointed I am.

What are you people doing?

Think of all the trouble I have from this.  This has been a disgrace and you don't have to all listen to my dad like he told you to do it

Inconvenient?

So, are all the other good people fighting the older lady I like for supposedly doing this, exploiting herself after she said she was against it and would have a relationship of some sort with me?  Hey, she has a family, so she's not a recluse.

So...

You can only mess up an older lady I like and not make anyone happy other than that my life is ruined.

"Jesus, I am overjoyed

To meet You face to face

You've been getting quite a name

All around the place

Healing cripples

Raising from the dead

And now I understand You're God

At least that's what You've said

So You are the Christ

You're the great Jesus Christ

Prove to me that You're divine

Change my water into wine

That's all You need do

And I'll know it's all true

C'mon King of the Jews

Jesus, You just won't believe

The hit You've made around here

You are all we talk about

The wonder of the year

Oh, what a pity

If it's all a lie

Still I'm sure that You can rock

The cynics if You try

So if You are the Christ

You're the great Jesus Christ

Prove to me that You're no fool

Walk across my swimming pool

If You do that for me

Then I'll let You go free

C'mon, King of the Jews

I only ask things I'd ask any superstar

What is it that You have got

That puts You where You are?

I am waiting, yes, I'm a captive fan

I'm dying to be shown

That You are not just any man

So if You are the Christ

Yes, the great Jesus Christ

Feed my household with this bread

You can do it on Your head

Or has something gone wrong?

Why do You take so long?

Come on, King of the Jews

Hey, aren't You scared of me, Christ?

Mr. Wonderful Christ

You're a joke, You're not the Lord

You are nothing but a fraud

Take Him away

He's got nothing to say

Get out, You King of the, get out

Get out, You King of the Jews

Get out, You King of the Jews

Get out of my life"

Me Singing Now

ALW

Andrew Lloyd Webber is like an English monk.

"Just don't ... say ...

... I'm

Damned for

All Time!"

Why?

People need to translate me using younger generations.

Petite?

Are entertaining people usually petite?

Easy, Enough

It was easy.  It was enough.

Why don't you do it?

I'm a person! It's because I'm a person!

Don't ask if I know how to be a person.

Music Appreciation

People traditionally trust I have the organ, but I at least have an inspiration from it.

Quote

"EVERY TIME I LOOK AT YOU I DON'T UNDERSTAND
Why you let the things you did get so out of hand
You'd have managed better if you'd had it planned"

"Personal Space"

Why are people trying to affect my life in ways that are none of their business?  If they are held back and don't do some things,is up to them and not of my fault if gone wrong.

Detectives

Early Generation X is like a baby thermometer.  Oh, is it 1991, is it 1997...  Just forget the children who are already born?!